Just when he was ready to pack it in, quit the group, just when he felt he had nothing of value to give and questioned why he’d joined in the first place, he asked, “What do I have to offer. Should I even be in this group?”
The group was established. They were inflexible and preferred to do things the way they'd always done things. But his humility told me we definitely had the right guy to lead. I rallied to his side. His ability to be vulnerable... his ability to risk... his ability to ask for feedback, filled me with admiration.
That was a few years ago and he had been going through a rough patch both emotionally and financially. Today Robert is a leader in our community and doing great things connecting, collaborating and asking. And teaching others to do the same.
That incident had a huge impact on me. It showed me that there is huge power in The Ask. When we are able to genuinely ask for feedback... when we admit we don’t know everything and ask for help, we're able to move forward in our personal growth by leaps and bounds. I've learned to ask in all areas of my life.
In his book The Success Principles: How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be, Jack Canfield talks about The Ask. In his chapter Ask! Ask! Ask! Jack says, “You have nothing to lose and everything to gain by asking. To be successful you have to take risks, and one of the risks is the willingness to risk rejection.”
The old saying goes Don’t ask if you’re afraid of the answer. I guess I had always been afraid of the answer.
There is a feeling of exhileration and hopefulness when I do The Ask. And I continue to be surprised that people like to be asked. People like to contribute, teach, give constructive feedback and support. I revel in the joy of collecting yes-es to my asks.
Since I have been doing The Ask, I have not been turned down yet. Am I taking advantage of asking? Definetly not. I treat it like something very special that I only take out on special occasions... like my grandmother's china. Although recently, I've been thinking about using that china every day. ;) Today I ask you... would like to SIGN UP to receive our Jank & File Newsletter?
It takes practice. Start today and let us know how you do with The Ask.